It's hard to realise what you are going through unless you see it through others' eyes. The problem is you can't. Not until it's after it all happens. 

I reflected on a few major events in my life over the last few years. Some events were dramatic like when I had surgery but freaked out at just the thought of being in hospital. Other events were nicer such as a time when I tried to find a suitable outfit to attend my sister's wedding in (and this is still ongoing as I still have no idea what I'll wear!!).

Looking back at these events I realised what people surrounding me must have thought. Take the surgery for instance. Everyone around me must have wondered why I'm panicking. It seemed simple and have been done billions of times and I was going home the same day or the following day by the latest. To me, it felt like I was having a heart transplant!

They always say one should seek the advice of those surrounding him/her at such difficult times as those outside the circle will be able to see the full story. What if you can't? What if you are so involved in the dilemma that you can't think clearly nor see that there are others around you? 

These are questions I doubt I will find the answers too...